“¹⁴ For this reason I kneel before the Father, ¹⁵ from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. ¹⁶ I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you

with power through his Spirit in your inner being, ¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,

¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, ¹⁹and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, ²¹ to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” Ephesians

Letting that resonate in my spirit on this rainy day.

Wedding dress shopping can be a beautiful experience or stressful. I walked through both. It really depends on where you go, who you bring with you, and the attendant who is helping you. Ok, a lot of factors. I guess it all boils down to, what your attitude and perspective is on that day.

When you get engaged I found that EVERYONE gives you an opinion on where to go dress shopping. The singles, the divorced, the newlyweds, the seasoned marriage-ers, the elopers. So be prepared. ”Go to this place, that place. This place sucks. No, don’t go here, you won’t find anything. Go here. They were so nice and accommodating.”

Well, I went to three joints, all of different status and price. Kleinfelds, Bridal Reflections, David’s Bridal (in that order). This is what I learned.

1. Needless to say, I was totally convinced to go to Kleinfelds. Everyone said, “Go for the experience.” At first I was hesitant. One, I ain’t got money for that. Two, I most likely will never meet Randy. Three, I ain’t got money for that. I pretty much walked in knowing I would not purchase anything but let’s just go for fun- Not fun. I was put in a little room that reminded me of a doctor’s waiting room. My mom and mother-in-law chilled outside the door. My attendant did not listen to what I liked and totally got ticked at my bridesmaid, Meg. Not cool. And for the last time, I do not want a corset back!

2. Next. Bridal Reflections was actually a great experience. I went there with just my mom and sister. I had my own separate room and everyone who works there is super accommodating, pleasant, good listeners, and practical. Didn’t rush me at all. I found a dress that I liked but you know, I have to see everything.

After that I did feel a little, “womp, womp.” I tried on a good amount of dresses and nothing… no major laughs, no heartfelt giggles, no tears, no “Ahhh, yesss” from the masses. Is this how I was suppose to feel? I say ladies, if you’re in my spot, do not give up hope! You will not have to walk down the aisle in sweatpants.

3. Lastly, I went to David’s Bridal. It was totally spur of the moment. Marissa, my MOH, was here visiting and she wanted to get in on all those “maid-of-honor” duties, so we went to David’s with my mother and sister. I walked around with Joan (total sweetheart) and I pushed back the dresses lined in plastic, one by one. Nothing, nothing. I felt like they were the same after awhile. Well, who knew, but I found my dress that day. In the place I didn’t expect, on the day I didn’t plan. It always seems to happen that way.

I didn’t cry but I laughed at my mom crying. I didn’t have this huge “aha” moment. I really just liked prancing around in this one more than the others. I think it’s like most things. You just kind of know.

So, my advice to you:

1. Plan and rip them pages out of your bridal magazines. It’s all good. But your opinion might change when you get to playing pretty little princess.

2. Stay within your budget. I mean a little overs not bad but don’t hurt the bank account. There are well-priced, good quality dresses out there.

3. At the same time, don’t settle. It is your wedding dress! So try to balance it out.

4. Go to a few places but don’t go to every retailer in your state. You’ll exhaust yourself, confuse yourself and tire the people with you.

5. Have the right attitude. If you feel like your hunt is endless, encourage yourself. You REALLY WILL find your dress. It is out there.

6. I went through the I-like-a-lot-of-dress-styles-it-depends-on-how-I-am-feeling-that-day. What if I wanted to be fun, or romantic, or vintage? Too many bridal characters to play! I needed to settle on a dress that could play all roles.

7. For me, the attendant makes a world of a difference. If they are experienced, they know body types, styles, fabrics. What blends with what season. They listen to you and bring you out things you actually want to put on. They work to make sure you find what you are looking for and they celebrate with you. Now, that’s a good attendant.

8. Lastly, go with your gut. On everything. The place, the price, what you feel confident in. I am easily swayed by people because I want everyone to agree with my decision. I want everyone to be happy. But in this case, you’re wearing the gown, so stick to your guns :)

Happy Wedding Planning!

Look at these heartbreaking statistics. 27 million people are enslaved, worldwide. That’s the population of New York Metro. It only costs on average, $90 or less to purchase a human being. Human trafficking exists in 161 countries. The slave industry makes bank- $32 billion dollars each year. 80% are women and around 5,000 women and girls are trafficked and raped in the United States. Right in your neighborhood.

So what can you do about it?

1.  Sign the End It petition online. You’re one more extra person saying, “no, this is wrong and it needs to stop.”

2. Give of your finances. End It partners with various, trusted coalitions that deal with all types of slavery.

3. Share with those around you. Don’t keep your mouth shut when the subject comes up. There are so many resources out there! Use social media to your advantage. #enditmovement

I’m so proud that I’m a part of a church that unites with a movement with the means to bring freedom to all. This Sunday we will be taking a special offering that will help with the End It efforts. Don’t stand idle. A real life is lived through action.

Some of my favorite things.

The Arrival: 

Matt, Meg, Jay, and I picked Marissa up from the airport! New York meets Florida once again! It was great having Marissa meet the special people that are in my life today. We had some froyo, a lot of laughs and called it a night.

 Early Saturday:

I had my enagement shoot in Central Park early in the morning, so to make that ugly morning better, we fueled up with Dunkin. It was so much fun having her there, not because she held our jackets and cheered us along in the chilly weather, and snapped random shots of us, but because I love sharing big life things with her. It was our first time in Central Park too!

After a nice cup of Starbucks, Matt had to depart but we ran around the city like hooligans! Our first stop was lunch at Cosi for delicious soup, sandwiches, catch up conversations. We planned out our day on a napkin too. Not because we couldn’t find paper. It just felt cool. Then we walked to Aroma coffee which we haven’t tasted since we were in Israel (separate trips but ya know). A delightful experience.

Then we hiked along in search of the subway station. I am actually afraid of subways mostly because I’m afraid of getting lost. I would have opted for a cab but what is the fun in that?! Marissa was determined to conquer the subway system with this noobie.

These two chicks made it through the Subway and walked into the fashion district. “Ohhhh, you were going there to check out all that fashion stuff”, you may say. Although we stopped into the FIT Museum to laugh… I mean admire the displays, we totally roamed around Seventh Avenue at 27th Street just to see where Samuel Jackson and the Rock “jumped off” a building in The Other Guys. After we took a bunch of pictures and acted like idiots, we walked all the way to Peter McManus Cafe to observe where Will Ferrell and Marky Mark once sat… in The Other Guys. I can only do these certain things with Marissa Swiech. Anyone else would hate me.

Times Square was our last stop to get our token pictures, spend money at Sephora, purchase matching necklaces at Forever21, grab a pretzel, buy pizza, and get hit on by a bunch of drunk guys. We did this surrounded by snow flurries! Romantic flair.

Sunday:

I love Sundays with Marissa because she visited enough now that people at church know her. We were asked if we were related at least ten times. I’m not exaggerating. The church atmosphere is such a big part of my life and I appreciate when Marissa gets added to it. It makes my heart happy.

After church, we headed back to the Bellomos to eat lunch and relax! Marissa and I are the biggest Lost fans. That was common ground when we first started living together. Now that I’ve been home, Matt and I have made it to the last season of Lost. So what else would we do on a Sunday… DUH. We watched Lost. Then the premiere of The Bible. Oh, and we ate again. Below you will see a non-flattering picture of us.

Monday:

We tried to sleep in but there wasn’t much time for that. We woke, pulled up our britches and went to David’s Bridal with my mama. Considering Marissa is oh-so-very-far-away, it’s a great feeling to have your maid of honor there with you searching to find your perfect wedding dress, which, I did! Then we ran around the store shopping for bridesmaid dresses. Joan, our associate, was awesome and after I said “yes” to the dress, I rang a bell. Kind of sounded like I was herding in cattle. Ok.

After a celebratory lunch, we went home, crashed, drove with Matt to Taco Bell, graced Friendly’s with our presence, and our matching Ninja Turtles shirts, then went home to watch a movie. Also, I can put this picture up because it is not my wedding dress. Most will say, “well, you shouldn’t put it up regardless because now people have seen you in a pretty, white dress!” I say, “If I look this frumpy on my wedding day. Shoot me.” You don’t know what the finish product will look like! Plus it’s the only shot of Marissa helping a girl out.

Tuesday:

Time for work! I did my own thing for awhile but Marissa stopped by the office and helped paint one of the rooms downstairs near the auditorium. After, we grabbed some food and played… GAMES OF THRONES. Which could be confusing and addicting at the same time. Matt won. But one day I will beat him. I just want to go to war with everyone and laugh at the descriptions on the cards. Glorified Pokemon.

Wednesday Drop Off:

This post may look like a documentary to you but to me it is full of life, expression, and days that I really treasure. As we drove to the airport with Taylor Swift bumping through the speakers, I couldn’t help but feel sad dropping off Roo. This time was a bit different then the other ones. Throughout her whole visit it felt like she lived in NY forever, and I don’t mean that in a negative way, I mean it in a you-are-home-to-me; positive way. Clarification: I’m totally straight saying this too. It felt like I never picked her up and never had to drop her off, like she lived here since I’ve been on Long Island. But I guess, that’s what real friendships feel like, never ending.

Friendships, dare I say, sisterhoods, like this are not always common and I can’t put into words how much Marissa has played a significant role in my life. A part of me has been completely molded by her and the memories that we share.

So we have agreed although Matt is my best friend, taking over that husband role of course, Marissa and I are bosom buddies. Sounds weird but totally applicable to our friendship. Anne of Green Gables had a bosom buddy. Why can’t I?

Bill works at Apple with Matthew and is married to beautiful Cecil, who was once a graphic illustrator (I might be getting this wrong but I’m in the ballpark). Cecil left her job to pursue her photography passion and now teams with Bill to take wonderful pictures. Thus, Once Upon a Honey B.

Being the newly engaged couple as we are, Matt and I are amateurs when it comes to posing like a happily-soon-to-be-married-couple but Bill and Cecil guided us along the way. I mean, we’re totally happy in natural surroundings but we have the tendency to look, possibly, goofy, under these circumstances. Nonetheless, Cecil and Bill made us so comfortable. At one point Matt and I were like, “this is fun. Can we do this every day?” Paparazzi actionnn!  We had a fantastic time walking around, exploring different spots in Central Park. Even though I live in New York, it was actually my first time roaming around Central Park. I know, I’m a bit ashamed myself but what an awesome way to spend my first. Not to mention, my Maid of Honor, Marissa, was in town and came along for the ride. What a trooper. She was a little photographer too.

So, here’s a little sneak peak because it is the only photo I have: 

Psalm 5: 7

More than ever I feel like I have a renewed sense of God’s amazingness and His unfailing, boundless love. I can’t wrap my mind around the thought that He takes me as I am. The forgiveness that He, with no strings attached, gives. Grace that has no end. It is only through Jesus that I am deemed worthy. I can enter in God’s presence without fear or condemnation. I can remain in deep and utter awe of Him.

I know, that’s right. The lease has been signed, the current attendants have moved out, the process of renovating is commencing, and we have moved into our new Seaford home. Renting of course. I know this sounds peculiar but not living in a hotel seems… weird. It’s been a little over two months now. Thursday night, I came back from work and my mom and I packed everything up and unloaded our fourth floor room into our cars. After the last trip, I turned the ignition and a familiar song came on. It was the same one that I played when I sat in my car, in front of my Amityville house praying and crying. I didn’t want to go back in there again and I had no idea where we would be next. How apropos. A closing of another chapter in my life.

Just a few in betweens. In my last living-status post, I had no idea where I would be. Well, we wound up being extended twice by FEMA, which although very last minute, was a huge blessing. It felt sereal leaving as I looked back at the hotel and if you’re asking, “did you really look back?”, as a sentimental person, yes I did. Moving again made me recall all the other times I’ve moved and I can’t help but think how every situation, I just picked up and left. No wandering in the halls, no taking in little last moments, no reminiceing of memories. I leave in a whirlwind. Always.

When I was younger we moved from West Hempstead to Massapeuqa. I was in 6th grade so it’s not like I prepared for the switch. I was there one day and then the next, in my new house. Then was the move from Massapequa to Amityville. The house was actually sold while I was in Jerusalem, Israel and I viewed the news via email from my mom. We came back, packed up shop and moving day was such a rush, I just left. Then there was college. I attended SEU for three years and if anyone has survived moving day and graduation, everyone knows there ain’t no time for nuttin’. Before I knew it I was on a plane to New York. Then… Amityville. Sandy happened and the next day you find out you’re not going back. Now… the hotel. We pulled the trigger before the storm hit this weekend and just moved.

Now because I try to find the layer of spiritual behind everything in my life, I’ve riddled this:

1. I think God just picks me up quickly and plants me somewhere else fast because He knows me. I’m a lingerer and although I am excited for the future, I am programmed, more than others I feel sometimes, to look at the past. I’ve always been like this since I was a little girl. I can look at these matters and feel contempt or I can learn once again, the value of the present and wait expectantly for what lies ahead. The past really is that. The past. Most of the greats are the ones who are flexible and are able to move to the next thing. So I must be in good company. ::cross fingers::

2. Now that the storage unit has vomited everywhere in our house and has created a mountain of God knows what, we all have come to the realization that we don’t need this stuff. It’s clutter. I’ve lived without it for almost four months now and living without it has been liberating! Without knowing, that “stuff” kind of holds you down. Time to clean house again and keep the focus on what really matters.

3. Lastly, it’s funny how you get moved into a new home, and you see the wrong. You see the work ahead, how dirty things are, the list of things to fix, etc. Each day though, I’m standing in an answered prayer! GET A GRIP GIRL! Time to look FORWARD and at what is next.

When you’re in trying situations, where you feel displaced and uncomfortable, you don’t see it at that time but you are being shaped and formed; to come out more mature than what you were before. It sounds crazy, but after the hard work, the parting with things, the cries, frustrations, sometimes even complaining, I’m grateful that it happened. I’ve learned to praise God through situations, trust Him with my life, with my next moves, to be flexible, to refocus, and to be grateful for who I have not what I have.

The End of an Era… Sort of.

Here’s to Seaford and a New Home! 

Matt and I wanted a quirky kind of wedding. No regular hall with regular food, no dirty Italian rugs. Long Island makes it kind of hard compared to other countries in the US. The Knot features cute backyard weddings, swanky rooftop ceremonials- things that are unrealistic for us. Matt and I looked into preserved gardens, museums, even nice libraries-all kind of a dead end route, at least for us. So, we did our research and went on a venue hunt, complete with a good package. After awhile venue shopping got FUN. Here is our venue track record in brief words.

Planting Fields: Beautiful gardens, not wedding material unless you want to bring x amount of vendors in. Not in our budget and pshh we ain’t got no time for that.

Fox Hollow: First venue we really liked. Loved the brick, old inn feel, loved the new room, loved the cocktail room, loved that complimentary hotel suite ;) They gave us a free stuffed fox but commitment is a tough thing for me so we ventured on.

Crest Hollow: Really nice, multiple wedding at a time, spacious, sweet outdoors, but no fuzzy feelings. Having cocktail hour outside near a pool didn’t feel romantic to me. Moving on. They did give us free drinks and dessert though.

New Hyde Park Inn: Really beautiful, killer outside ceremony and cocktail hour (both indoor and outdoor). Expensive and little availability. Definitely moving on.

Jericho Terrace: Badda Bing, Batta Boom! That was the guy who helped us. Although he totally rubbed me the wrong way, he grew on me a tad at the end. Legit party rooms, all refurnished. The dome room was sick, great uplighting potential. Yummy appetizers- they actually really fed us so that was fun! Instead of a folder with information they give you the Holy Grail of Jericho Terrace (a huge binder). We liked Jericho but it wasn’t our style.

Westbury Manor: We loved Westbury Manor and besides the Fox Hollow they offered us a ridiculous price that was almost hard to pass up. The reception room was nice, the outdoor ceremony was very pretty, and the cocktail hour would have been sick. I would have had roaming peacocks at my cocktail hour! The only thing that made us nervous was- rain. If it rained we would be stuck in a small cocktail room, blehhh.

So drumroooooollllllll,

We are getting married at the Fox Hollow!

Matt and I went back to view it again after work and we really just loved it. We would look back and forth at each other and smile as Bruce went on showing us the rooms. We sat down with Bruce (gotta love the name), we searched for the perfect date and decided on a pretty, romantic day wedding.

So some things I learned along the way:

1. Don’t feel overwhelmed. Plan your budget, get a round-a-bout guest list and stick with it. It helps and you feel more prepared when negotiating.

2. Ceremony and Venue. Decide whether you want to get married in a church and head to a venue for the reception or find ceremony/reception options in the same location.

3. Everything is Negotiable. So, I’m not good at this. I almost feel bad negotiating so that is where my other half kicks in. Dusting off those mortgaging skills, he talked his way through different possibilities. Don’t give up easy but don’t tick them off! I mean, in the end, they do want your business.

4. Read your Contract and Venue Policy. Don’t gaze through it. Find out the do’s and dont’s. Do I have to use their vendors, can I bring in my own? Any hidden fees? How much do you tip your maitre d’ and bridal attendant? Cake cutting fees?

5. Parking. Is my location accessible for parking. Do you get your own valet?

6. Plan B’s. What if mother nature decides to rain on your parade? Even if you’re indoors you want to make sure that your guests don’t get drenched from their car to the door.

7. Help Included. Does the venue come with a facility director and what is their role? Or do you have to hire from outside. Yayyy, I get one!

8. Like The People. Make sure you get along with the person you will be touching base with. Because you will be working with them a lot. The Jericho Terrace guy way too much Uncle Vinny for me.

9. Cut your Costs. Wherever you can cut your costs and adjust, it’s a beautiful thing. We’re not having an open bar which left us wiggle room for a decreased price or replacements.

10. Trust your instincts. But really.  

Well, that covers location. What’s next?

Ok, I’m over the dramatic entrance of that paragraph. Moving on. You only live in this moment once! This will be the only time where I straddle the line of not being single and not being married. Why not document for the fun of it! So stay tuned for some sporadic posts from this bride-to-be.

You might think this is going to be a post about three women living in a hotel but you are mistaken. Okay, no you’re not. You’re actually right. This is a blog post about three women living in a hotel. I wouldn’t really call it a suite either but it has its benefits.

For the past month I have been able to walk around the corner and grab a cup of coffee anytime of the day or night, I’ve taken advantage of the dry cleaning at the front desk, and I’ve saved on quarters by doing my laundry onsite. Using hotel laundry utilities is cheaper than laundry mats (knowledge based off my experience thus far). I’ve seen the lobby full of life and people chatting away, people sectioned in the same category as my family. I’ve also seen it empty and silent. They set up breakfast and cereal at 2am. Witnessed that one, one late night too. I’ve spent multiple nights skyping friends in the sectioned off room of the lobby as well. Many nights of phone calls, blogging, and highlights of the Knicks have taken place here. I’ve used the gym… once. Nonetheless, I have ran on a treadmill with Top Gun playing on TV.

Evenings have been spent with my mom and sister in the same room. I thank God for the aero bed Meg and Jay gave me so I don’t have to sleep on the pull out bed. I have scanned the first of countless bridal magazines in this very location. This circumstance has even given me the excuse (really, need) to purchase slippers.

I’ve met the security guard who patrols The Marriot every night. The staff is of course, no longer acquaintances but friends, who have laughed and took part in some of my odd mishaps this season. John* does not believe in off days (he didn’t take off for Christmas Eve or Christmas) but has scheduled off for New Year’s Eve. I have the most wonderful, sweetest housekeeper. She is from El Salvador and has two younger boys. We speak Spanish together and she’s rather kind because I suck at it.

I’ve spent the Christmas season here and yes, our door in the hallway is the only one with its very on wreath. Looking from the outside you know exactly which room is ours because we decorated the windows with lights and Christmas spirit. Opening gifts and spending Christmas morning here was not so bad at all, not with family. I shall be ringing in the New Year and waking up to January in the same place.

I’ve had multiple conversations with people and families who are rebuilding their homes. Different people, similar stories. This really fit, blonde, optimistic woman, Sarah, who is here with her husband and young boys, they’re in limbo right now. Candy who I met in the process of finishing my laundry, she’s here with her husband, cute dog, and two teenage sons (who don’t bring girls home yet. Which she actually wants… because she’s tired of being surrounded by men?) Their house in Oakdale is being remodeled.

I say all of this to explain, well, I don’t know. Just to prove that hotel life has been an adventure and I’ve met some good people along the way. An adventure that is coming to a close because FEMA has run out of money and we have two weeks to find another living scenario.  Hotel living has been this weird space in time that has existed but not really? I can’t even explain it.

I have to say, the mysterious lifestyle of a nomad has left many bewildered and even the “stable minded” sometimes jealous of the pick-up-and-go-no-worries-in-the-world-everything-will-work-out-in-it’s-own-way mentality. WELL, I don’t mind the curveballs life throws, I’m briefed on the reality that life is not a static line, and I hope and pray that I handle things to the best of my ability BUT I’m readdddyyyyy to close this chapter. I’m not sure if I make a very good long-term nomad either. I’m tired of not having a home and each day I do my best to give my worries to God but it’s a workout. Your bet on where I will be in the next few weeks is as best as mine so as soon as I know… I’ll fill you in.

All in all, it has been a suite life with some sweet moments. Signing off, Gina.

*All names have been changed to protect the identity of all persons involved in this post. Let’s be real, my writings are not famous but I feel weird using real names. Call me strange.

Honestly, I couldn’t be any more cheerful! I am marrying the most incredible, considerate, big-hearted person in the whole entire world! The time I’ve spent with Matthew has been the best of my life. When God puts something together, nothing that I could arrange could ever compare. Here is my scrambled version of the events that happened.

November 26th marks a wonderful day! Matt and I woke up early in the morning to head to Washington DC to “pick up books.” Little did I know I was prepped in advance for this little decoy of a plan two weeks before. Pastor Todd told me that I may have to take a drive to Pastor Mark Batterson’s church to pick up donated books for Sandy victims. I was so confused…

Me: “Why can’t they send them down?”

PT: “Something, like there are too many to send via mail.”

Me: “Ohhh………. okay!”

Of course I was going to connect with the lovely Jennifer, Pastor Mark’s assistant to schedule everything but apparently Pastor Todd already worked out the details… I read her email, signature included… her fake email! The week of, Pastor Todd confirmed our travels and Matt chimed in to explain how he was off from work and that we would make a small trip out of the Monday. I couldn’t really argue with a deal so sweet. I needed a disjunction from the normal and we love DC anyways. Why not road trip and delight in a date?

I spent that past month shifting my life around, losing my home, living in instability, dealing with daily stresses and more, trying to keep the peace, needless to say… I was literally overjoyed just to spend a day with Matt. I went out and bought new shoes and a cardigan, just because. The night before, I had the unpremeditated feminine urge to paint my nails for the first time since the hurricane (talk about perfect timing).

I know it may sound cliché and expressive but I literally woke up that morning saying, “today will be a good day and I will see the good in everything!” I sounded like I took advice from a self-help column but honestly, life had left me feeling so downtrodden and exhausted that I couldn’t spend one more day dealing with negativity and heaviness. I made the choice to bless God and behold all the good in my life.

I’ve always wondered how I would feel the day of. You know? Will everything go as planned, will it go smoothly, will it be creative and special, will I know, will I not know, will I feel ready? I am always on a quest for the perfect conditions. Perfect timing and settings for everything (I’ve been unlearning that a bit too). I can’t be the only female who has thought this?! But beyond the pleasant and relaxing morning, my heart felt at total ease. What’s relieving is that without knowing, or anything that I could do with my own ability, God had everything in his hands, and I was very prepared for this occasion.

If there is one person who sees the good in everything it is Marissa. After receiving a heartwarming text from her, I sent her a video back in the car. Recollecting now, that small snippet of communication is something I cherish before my engagement.

So our road trip went a little like this. We grabbed a small snack and coffee (duh) and started our journey into the perfect fall weather, talking, switching through CDs, and reading and discussing devotionals. We stalled at some road stops to reflect: DC is pivotal because it was a time in my life when God was really working on my heart and clarifying my call. Little did I know, God was doing the same in Matthew’s heart as well. After that staff trip, I knew I needed to excel to a higher level of leadership and dedication (you would think having a bachelors in ministry would have confirmed that but you know… slow learner.) That had to be my main focus and as I trusted Him, I knew all things would work out for good in the end.

Well, you would think I may have had a clue that something extravagant was going to happen by then, you know, with our conversations and our pit stops but noooo. Be ready because this is going to come off mushy but Matthew is really that sentimental to me always. Actually his love for me continually surprises me and stands as a reminder of how my Creator views and loves me: precious, unique, and beautiful. Finally when we arrived in DC we stopped at Ebenezers Coffee House, grabbed some tea, and headed outside. First we sat in one place… only to move to another…?

Me: “So you want to go get the books now?”

Matt: “Umm, yeah I’m just waiting for a text.”

So what does any oblivious and excited girlfriend do in DC? Take pictures of everything on her iPhone! I start taking pictures of the area, Ebenezers, and Matt. Looking back now they crack me up. He’s smiling in one, serious in another. One nervous and a few of him looking around. I thought he was modeling but really he was scouting out the perfect moment. So finally when this naive girl finished her snapshots, Matthew seiezed the opportunity and filled the air with a bunch of special sentences that I keep to myself- and got down on his knee and asked me to intertwine my life with his.

I was shocked. I think I went through…. who, what, when, where, why, how and then I said “yes.” I laughed, I cried. People in the coffeehouse gave their smiles of approval through the windows, their intern came out and snapped pictures of us and asked us our story along with our new friend, Vondale, who “never witnessed someone get engaged before!”

We basked in the moment! Ebenezers tweeted us on their homepage, we called our family and friends. We had an elegant, mature dinner as… fiancés, and walked DC as… fiancés. It was wonderfully weird and everything I thought it would be.

Matthew and I are people, people. We love people! Family, friends, acquaintances, strangers. It’s what’s important to us and all the encouraging words, phone calls, laughs and “we knew its” made our day even more beautiful. I know I speak for the both of us when I say, “Thank You!” Your words are more than just words. They hold peace, happiness, support and excitement.

Now this is for you because I know you’re reading this. Matthew, my most dedicated blog follower and soon-to-be husband. I cannot picture my life without you and I refuse. Our story is made up of so much detail and character that we know it wasn’t just our doing. I mean don’t get me wrong, we’re good but we’re not that good ;) You add more laughs, smiles, understanding and love to my life every day. I’m grateful that our paths converged exactly when they did and beyond that I’m grateful we both trusted ourselves and each other moving forward. All my prayers, wishes and desires have calculated to you. Now before this turns into my future vows… I love you!

Oh, yeah. There were no books.

I can officially join the bandwagon along with all the other citizens of this grand world and say, “yes I have once lost my wallet.” Two weeks after Sandy, I started getting back into a normal work schedule and it felt good but it was as if pieces of my brain were vacationing somewhere else. I felt like I couldn’t retain information as much and I couldn’t multitask well. I’ve heard people explain how your brain can just check out. Now I get it. I was screaming at my brain to check in and it was aimlessly taking his time. Here I am thinking, this is fine, I got it together but now I’m well-informed that sometimes focusing is out of our control.

So how did you lose it you may ask? I left it on top of my car when pumping my gas and drove away. Don’t judge me. I was texting, then I took a phone call and was rushing to BJs. See, proof that I was deficient in the multitasking arena or that I was overly distracted with the excitement of pumping my gas for the first time without a massive line.

I learned that you really don’t know what you have in your wallet until you lose it. I got out of the car at BJs only to conceive the reality of, “I don’t think I have my BJs card with me. Ohh, I don’t have my wallet at all!!!” I barreled in the car, drove back to the scene of the crime, and spoke with the owner of the station. Nothing. I traced my tracks over and over and over again. I trusted God, then I cried, then I got imprudent, then my dad called, then I called my mom, then I called Matt. I already lost an assortment this month, why my wallet?! Just being honest. This normally wouldn’t matter to me on any normal day. I would just cancel my cards, get a new license (I really need to), call it a day BUT, big but. I had in there gift cards and cash from friends who supported me through the hurricane situation. Ironically, I never carry around cash, that’s usually my problem. This was the first time I did and if any law-abiding, gracious civilian wanted to return my wallet, they would send it to my old address.

One police report later, one drive to my old house, and one phone call to Marissa, I felt alleviated. Here is where the principle of this story takes stage. After all that venting and Marissa understanding, she challenged me to list three things I’m thankful for. And would you look at that, all three had nothing to do with that wallet. After collecting time to cool down and refocus, I realized God provided for me before, so just let it go and move on. He will do it again and beyond that, what really brings joy to my life is the people in it. I’ve seen this replicated over and over again through the situations I’ve gone through. Once I really let something go and I settle it in my heart, God never, never fails to restore what I feel like I lost. Life is a classroom, we’re students in this never ending cycle. Just shaking off the excess is really all it is. Baring and shredding down to the substantial. The simple building blocks of the human soul.

Long story short. I got my wallet back that night. With everything in it. I know. It’s a legit miracle. An older man riding his bike, who only spoke Hindi saw me drive away and picked it up. He brought it home and explained the story to his English speaking son. I can’t deny that it was an interesting and bizarre process of identifying myself and waiting 45 minutes to have it in my hands but whatever! I was beyond grateful and relieved. Don’t miss or delay the opportunity to trust God, no matter how terrible the outlook seems and remember to keep what really matters in life the bull’s eye of your heart.

Tagged: 2012, Beauty, Christian, Christianity, Event, Friends, God, Humor, Hurricane, Hurricane Sandy, Inspiration, Life, Life Lesson, Local, Long Island, Losing, Love, Memories, Miscellaneous, New York, People, Personal, Photo, Provision, Random, Sandy, Spiritual, Thoughts, Wallet ]]> http://gcampanale.wordpress.com/2012/12/12/the-art-of-losing-your-wallet-2/feed/ 2 gcampanale Wallet http://gcampanale.wordpress.com/2012/12/07/the-good-stuff/ http://gcampanale.wordpress.com/2012/12/07/the-good-stuff/#comments Fri, 07 Dec 2012 06:44:37 +0000 gcampanale http://gcampanale.wordpress.com/?p=2720 ]]> So I promised to tell you the good things that have happened in this Sandy disaster, at least from what I’ve seen. What kind of blog would this be if I didn’t define a silver lining? Yes, there was a lot of tragedy but I saw the church do some of its best work.

Hey, Partner: As a church we were able to partner with Convoy of Hope and keep in touch with Samaritan’s Purse as they were participating in food distributions, clothing drops, and gutting houses. Although the week in the office felt far from normal (catching water in buckets, anyone?), I was able to connect with a bunch of pastors in our region. Hearing first hand what they were doing in their community and the personal stories of those they were helping were legit heartwarming. I saw a network of pastors and leaders working together for a common goal and for the name of Christ. For the record, I want to give credit to the men and women who are leading churches in New York, that really stepped in to make a difference. We have an amazing crew of people who genuinely want to express God’s love to a hurting place. I’m honored to work amongst them.

Expansion: What’s cool about the body of Christ is that it expands way past our little community borders. At The Point, we were in contact with various teams that just decided to come down and volunteer their time. We had a new crew crashing at our church every few days and I have to say, it was fun! In the midst of being displaced and being rained on when I came into work, I enjoyed every bit of conversation I had with those teams. Not only did I gain new friends but I appreciated the time and effort they put into being there for strangers. So many people felt alone and overwhelmed by their flooding damages- these churches and teams brought hope to them.

Provision: God provides sometimes in unlikely places. I can’t tell you how many people and churches blessed The Point so that we would be able to gain more resources to give back to our community and certain members in our congregation who experienced Sandy hardships. I learned the power of connections! Sometimes you meet people and you’re like, “man that was cool.” Or you bless someone because you really wanted to, even if it didn’t make sense at the time. I’ve been learning more than ever that God sees around the corner when I can’t. All things work out in the coolest ways!

Hope: I’ve seen a lot of hope. There is not too much to elaborate on but I’ve seen people find hope in God again, in church again. Hope just because people got down in the mud with them just to make things easier for them. Where there is hope, there is healing and nothing can be more rewarding.

Humbled: As for me and my story, I was BEYOND BLESSED. I can’t even begin to explain to you how much my church family means to me. I sat down and made a list of all the people I wanted to thank and was taken back by the generosity that was shown to me and my family. My pastor showed up and helped a random church team move out our stuff (and fed us dinner), Meg combated mold with me and blessed my family with gifts (thanks Meg and Jay for them sneaks), and my dad, Dave, and Matt did all the heavy work I could never do. Jeff, Kara, Sam, the Woitkos- couldn’t get through the kitchen and patio without you people! Michelle, thank you for making me laugh in the most horrible of times and for wrapping decorative plates with me! Aunt Susan and the Oms opened up their home. The Bellomo’s gave me permission to probably too many showers. So many friends gave to me financially- honestly I was overwhelmed. So many people offered their houses, bedroom sets, and encouragement. Even in the little things- getting a hair straightener and a curling iron! Those little gifts made me feel normal again! Being in ministry, the nature of the “job” is loving on others, showing them that they have purpose in Christ, and another aspect is serving and helping in troubling times. I’ve been through difficult circumstances before but this was the first time I experienced something to this extent. It’s very humbling to be on the other side and I am SO GRATEFUL. Words cannot express.

Being Schooled: There are certain things I’ve learned during this process. First, who thought I would be having a fun time with my dad during this idiotic crap. I have a better relationship with my dad now than I’ve had in the past years. Like I said, very grateful. Second, I am never living near water. Ever. All those wonderful days of the year don’t make up for the one day that wipes your house away. Third, adopt pets with caution. Not sure if I want the responsibility of cats or dogs, especially if I have to pack up and move. I’ll stick to the staple goldfish. Fourth, my clown neighbors were actually not that weird. If anything, they were kind, helped me move out a table and were comical. Fifth, I’ve had more conversations with my neighbors due to Sandy than I did before. And I liked it. Sixth, you really appreciate what you have more once they are gone or when necessities are much harder to obtain. I hope now, I never lose this feeling. That everything I’m blessed with is truly a gift. Lastly, I get it. One day during that week I went to volunteer at Evangel Church of God where I knew a few friends. Tara and I drove around handing out whatever we could to people who were leaving their trashed houses. One woman I met was sitting in her car outside her house and we got into a conversation. They had to move out, showering at the gym, lost everything and my response back to her was a genuine, “I get it.” I know what it feels like to air out your family pictures on your front lawn. I know what it’s like to throw out memories. I know what it’s like to have your normal flipped upside down in a day. And for the first time, what I went through… felt good.

So yes, after a month of instability, family debacles, sleeping on the floor, moving into a hotel, I don’t know the list could go on, there is…

 The good stuff.

You just have to put yourself aside to see it.

The Beginning: Earlier in the day before Sandy even hit we were already experiencing a very high-tide. When you are surrounded by water- down the block, around the corner, and in your backyard, the odds are pretty much not in your favor. High tide flooded water all the way down our block and actually reached all the way up our driveway. I couldn’t even stand at the end of my corner, in the middle of the street without water pouring into my rain boots. Leopard rain boots. Thankfully, I moved my car before the tide got horrific.

The Departure: My family and I anxiously waited for the tide to recede so we could carry out our plan: get to our booked hotel room. The cars were packed, clothes for a few days already folded away, and cats crying in their portable cages. Dining room set, couches, chairs, planters, everything floor-like, elevated on tall bins. Sounds like a dream, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, when low-tide came around, it wasn’t very low at all. I looked out our window watching the wind send the sea water rippling down our street. I thought to myself, “how the heck are we going to drive my mom’s car out of this mess of a storm that didn’t actually happen yet!” I’m not going to lie. With each half hour that passed I felt more and more trapped in our house. We seriously needed to leave. Late afternoon, we drove my mom’s car through the newly developed lake. The water splashed up the windows of the Ford. Enough said. I thought I was going to have to push that thing out of the water.

Temporary Lodging: Our hotel experience was not so bad. Minus the inconvenience of having to just pick up and leave, we had a nice little evening. Picked on some food, napped, watched more of the news, gained more information on the storm, showered, and watched the new Jonas show. There was a lot of instagramming, facebooking, and reading to keep from falling into boredom. Eventually we lost power.

Morning: Upon waking up my feelings on the storm were, “hmm, not bad.” Where we were located, it just sounded like a strong winters storm outside our windows. The electric was up and running and I thought to myself, “this must have been like another Irene scare.” That was until we called Sandy, our landlord. I know, I can’t make this stuff up. It was then that she told us news that wasn’t good news at all. She explained how we were flooded, how our things were ruined- the whole nine-yards. We really didn’t know what to expect. I mean, it’s not like we’ve been flooded before.

The Damage: Once out and about exploring, the damages from Sandy were undeniably noticeable. You couldn’t get in touch with anyone. Cell towers down, traffic lights pointless. Telephone wires draped the streets, huge trees were uprooted with cement, store signs, shingles, ripped out and thrown to the air. In boating areas, such as Massapequa and Amityville all you could smell was sea water and the strong stench of oil. Dirt and damage was everywhere. The occasional military siting. I could hardly get in touch with Matt, my father, anyone from work. If you weren’t prepared before the storm with equipment, you running around trying to find generators, chainsaws, batteries, gas containers, rain boots, etc. was pretty much a lost cause. Home Depot, Walmart: packed. Places like Long Beach, Freeport, Far Rockaways, Howard Beach, obviously Jersey, the Islands, Manhattan were all conflicted by the storm.

The House: Driving through our Amityville area was a horror. Seeing people outside of their homes crying, angry and shocked was the horrible part. Getting to our house was, how could I say? Abnormal? We couldn’t drive down there because the streets were completely flooded. Blocks down, my mom parked the car, we walked for a bit and then she had to stop due to lack of adequate foot ware , therefore… I carried on in the leopard rain boots (these comments are for those who hate on my rubber soles)! I was the first to get to the house, the first to take off my gross socks. Upon site, there was debris everywhere. You name it was on our lawn. Mud, tall grass, wood, dolls, balls, food, picture frames, Christmas decor, certificates, bottles, shoes, a boat on the side of my house and yes… a huge dock. There were whole houses, gone into the expanded lake. Opening our front door sucked. Our floors were drenched in water and mud. The water reached to a high capacity and knocked everything down that we elevated. Our kitchen floor was curdled up. It smelt horrible. Things in the dining room made it in the living room, things in the living room made it to bedrooms. Water lines on our walls marked the happenings of last night. You get the picture. 

Cleaning House: Literally. The week was comparable to the week you experience when someone dies. It’s a blur. Everything happens fast, the days overlap one another, and at the end of each day you are exhausted. That whole week we threw things out, from mattresses, clothes, rugs, and pictures. Packing things, boxing things, airing out pictures on the front lawn. Figuring out how we were going to move what we had into a storage unit. Unlearning old habits. You don’t have to wipe your feet before you enter, you can ring out soaked clothes in your bedroom, and your house is your garbage. Some areas looked like war zones. I can’t really explain to you the capacity of the experience. I guess in one word, I would say that it was “overwhelming.”

Plan B and the New Normal: We didn’t think that we would not have a home to go back to but that is what happened. Not knowing where you’re going to house yourself is not a settling feeling. Thankfully, Matthew’s aunt had a one-bedroom basement apartment that we crashed in. You try living with your mother in that tight space. We still had no electricity for about a week, food stores were running out of necessities, and getting to the pump took hours. Waking up at 4:00am to drive around and look for gas is not fun, especially when your wasting gas driving! The lines were blocks upon blocks long. People waiting 3-8 hours to tank up. People didn’t have power or heat for weeks. Some people still don’t have heat due to the overload of requests. Honestly, showering and eating wasn’t much a priority when you have a ton of other things on your mind. I bummed showers at different joints. Living out of plastic bags gets old fast too. I had the whole missionary look going on for a few weeks and I carried around a backpack with a change of clothes and showering supplies everywhere I went. I finally headed back to work the week after, only to find that my church was damaged as well. We had to gut out the two upper-floor rooms that we just newly painted and carpeted AND due to the nor’easter, we had more flooding and damages that leaked to the first floor. I could not escape water for the life of me.

The End but Not the End: After three weeks of hopping around and traveling back and forth to our old home, we finally packed up shop and removed everything. Of course with the help of many people. Now that was a lot of detail but it only covers 10% of everything I saw, the frustrations I encountered, the concerns I’ve had, the amount of people I spoke to, partnered with and shared their pain. I wish I could bottle it up and show you but that, my friend, is impossible. So this was the overall hard part of the story. Now I’ll get to all the good that has come out of this Sandy. Next post.