For my yoke is easy and my burden is light

Matthew 11:30

Recently I feel like I have been hitting a brick wall. There are days where I feel stable, energized, and hopeful and other days where I have a heavy heart and my joy seems so hard to obtain. Even though I try, it’s as if I allowed this gap to widen between God and I. My walls go up and I have to continuously battle to get my relationship back to where it is supposed to be. Sometimes I feel foolish running around in circles, only to come back round all over again. I know I can’t be the only person in the world who has felt this way!

Tonight was about the potter and the clay (Jeremiah 18). Being a Christ follower is a continuous routine of breaking and molding, creating a life of worship. It is times like this, when I realize that my life is not mine, that the concept of repentance is not just words but an action of the mind and heart. It is real and transforming. It is tangible and should not be forgotten. Although true, it can be so hard to let go. To let go and allow healing to take place, allow friends to uplift and encourage, allow God to once again barge into my space. When did it ever become just my space?

When did I allow my heart to get heavy? Why did I pick up the burden when there is One who wants to carry it for me? It is time to realize, again, that I will never fully be in control. I will find comfort in knowing that there is One who knows all things and will take care of me and everyone else. Mold me and shape me, even though it hurts, even though I will enter into this process over and over again. Recenter, build up, pour into, crush down, and restore until I reflect my purpose in you.


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